Tag Archives: septa
Hipster on S-E-P-T-A
Let me tell you the story
Of a bearded Hipster
and his tragic and fateful time…
Hipster grabbed his bike
and kissed his Vegan Girlfriend
Went to ride on the Frankford Line
Hipster
Did he ever return,
No he never returned
And his fate is still unlearn’d
He may ride forever
On the Market-Frankford
He’s the Hipster who never returned.
El oh El
Hipster swiped his Transpass
At the Spring Garden Station
With his bicycle lock and chain
When he sat down, some Punks
locked his bike to the seat,
Hipster couldn’t get off of that train…
Don't let it end...
Did he ever return,
No he never returned
And his fate is still unlearn’d
He may ride forever
‘neath the streets of Fishtown
He’s the Hipster who never returned.
The streets of Fishtown
Now all night long
Hipster rides through the tunnels
Crying, “What will become of me?
How will I get to my Pabst
in West Philadelphia
Or my cousin in Nor’Liberty?”
Clark Park, West Philly
Did he ever return,
No he never returned
And his fate is still unlearn’d
He may ride forever
Under Powelton Village,
He’s the Hipster who never returned.
WKDU, Hipster Radio
Vegan Girlfriend goes down
To Girard Street station
Every day at quarter past two
And through the open window
She hands Hipster falafel
As the train comes a’rumblin’ through.
It looks like poop
Did he ever return,
No he never returned
And his fate is still unlearn’d
He may ride forever
Under 56th and Market,
He’s the Hipster who never returned.
University City IS West Philly
As his train rolled on
underneath the river wards
Hipster looked around and sighed:
“Well, I’m smelly and disgusting
And my skinny jeans are crusting;
I guess this is my last long ride.”
It's beer!
Now all you Philadelphians,
Don’t you think it’s a scandal
That the Hipster has to sit and whine?
Fuck the Saviour!
Vote for Larry West!
Get poor Hipster off the Frankford Line!
The Saviour
Or else he’ll never return,
No he’ll never return
And his fate will be unlearned
He may ride forever
On the Market Frankford
He’s the Hipster who never returned
phila maneto!
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Filed under Fun Stuff, Irrationality, Mistakes, Music, Rant, Uncategorized
Septa Inepta UPDATE!!!1!111
So after the events of the last post from me, I did what the responsible blogger would do….bitch to customer service about something they had very little control over. Here’s what I wrote….
Comment: Complaint
Incident Date: 2/23/2009
Time of Incident: 4:00 pm
Boarding Location: Ridge Ave and Fountain St
Final Destination: 30th St Station/Drexel University
Route: 9
Vehicle Number: 5916
Block Number: 13
Direction of Travel: Center City
Employee: Heavyset black male with glasses
Comments: While going into Center City on the 9 (which picked me up at Ridge and Fountain 10 minutes late to begin with) the driver missed the exit for 30th St and had to detour through South Philadelphia via Grey’s Ferry Ave and 34th st. This resulted in my being 30 minutes late for class at Drexel University. My complaint is over the concept of a driver getting lost on a regular route, and his inability to correct his course and get back on track, as he made several attempts to relocate 76. When questioned and commented to, he replied unprofessionally and sarcastically, as if it were the fault of the riders.
I believe that SEPTA’s patrons pay too much to have to deal with the scenario described above. I support SEPTA daily with my own travel to Drexel and through town, and indirectly through my support of the Transpasses issued to Philadelphia Students. I truly feel that these situations should never happen, and am very disappointed in the actions of this driver. I do not feel out of place in requesting my fare back for this trip, and an apology to myself and the other riders on this bus.
Maybe a little on the bitchy side…but hey, I was annoyed. A few short days later, and they actually got back to me! Here’s their reply…
Dear Mr. Grow,
Thank you for contacting us and please accept our apologies for the inconvenience that you were caused as a result of this operator’s error. Upon receipt, your report was forwarded to Management in the Bus Transportation Division. The operator cited was identified and has been re-instructed on proper routing and his customer service responsibilities by Supervision. He was reminded that what he thought was “just a mistake” could have been VERY IMPORTANT for our customers. Appointments and important engagements could have been missed (and apparently classes as well). The operator is a new operator and his performance is being monitored in our new hire coaching program.
If you will let us know your mailing address, we will be happy to send you a token good for a future ride.
Sincerely,
Barry Berky
SEPTA Customer Service
Haha…suck it SEPTA. I emailed him back and took him up on the offer for a free token. I’m pretty sure it’ll never come, but I can hope. So finally, I work towards evening the score against SEPTA…..South Eastern Pennsylvania Transportation Authority 45, Dave 1. Suck it.
philamaneto!
Thank you!
Septa Inepta
As you may know, I take the bus to Drexel every day for class rather than drive or live on campus. It’s a lot cheaper, and for the most part, it’s actually quicker as the Townhouse of Doom is RIGHT across the street from the bus stop for the 9. So the 9 takes about 22 minutes to get to Drexel, and about half of that is getting to the highway through the neighborhood. So I basically figure about half an hour to get to school, and I always get to school on time, barring some sort of SEPTA catastrophe. Catastrophe may be too strong of a word for today’s events….maybe we should call it…a retardation.
My normal commute, about 22 minutes
Ok, so as you can sort of see there….I live at A. The bus takes Ridge Avenue through the neighborhood until it gets to about where you see US 1 and I-76 meet, where it gets on I-76, the Schuykill Expressway (The Expressway or 76) and hops off 76 at Market St (which is basically the block above Chestnut there), location B. Straight shot, easy peasy, lemon squeezy. I could find my way there in my sleep. I could walk there with my eyes closed (which probably would have been a quicker trip today…). So there’s really no reason for it to ever take more than 30 minutes, unless there’s some sort of traffic nightmare, and even in bad traffic, 76 still moves except during the morning rush (and God knows if there’s anything more important than having Fridays off, it’s not having morning classes…).
Gettin' off 76, yr doin it rite!
So here’s how the bus usually gets off 76. You see the little 3 in the bubble to the left of the B? My classroom is RIGHT on the other side of those railroad tracks. Pretty good reason to take the bus to school instead of driving, huh? So 76, if you don’t know, is an interstate. It’s a pretty busy highway, nicknamed the Surekill, and unlike those rural highways where you can just turn at the next corner, only has exits every so often. Enter: our first problem.
Getin' off 76, YR DOIN IT RONG!
So I look out the window and realize that we aren’t taking the ramp. I dismiss this initially, It must be my imagination. Then the kids from Roxborough High School start yelling, I realize that he really DID not make the exit. Probably a detour, there’s a lot of construction going on down there, and I mean ALOT. No big deal….until I start to think a little bit….where is the next exit off the highway? Then I see the bus driver throw his hands up in a fit of frustration. That’s when I really started to realize how big of a problem this was…
Where all the hippies meet, South St!
So the next exit there is the South St exit, home of the famous South St bridge. Okay, this would be enough of an inconvenience, but he could just loop up 33rd st there, over Market…no harm, no foul. By the way, it was about 4:03 at this point. Even though the bus had picked me up about 10 minutes late, there WAS the chance to still get there on time. This was also when my favorite part of the whole ordeal occurred. The bus driver turns to the crowded bus and yells “BEAR WITH ME HERE, I MISSED THE EXIT…” and some kid yells, “NO SHIT, DUMMY!” I laughed pretty hard at that. The driver did not. So we could just turn onto the South St bridge and call it a day, and this is what the driver explained he was going to do…until…someone so kindly pointed out to him that the South St bridge current looks like this:
Bridge...yr doin it rong!
So, I’m really glad someone points out to him that THERE’S NO FUCKING BRIDGE THERE ANYMORE! That exit’s been closed for like 2 months for them to rebuild it. Sigh. So then he starts soliciting advice from the passengers. We end up In Grey’s Ferry. Rather than continue to show MORE maps that won’t mean much unless you live here, suffice it to say that it simply became more and more frustrating when he KEPT making turns in the opposite direction. It was actually a little embarrassing when he pulled a u-turn in a Dunkin’ Donuts parking lot.
sigh.
So this here is a map of what I’m pretty sure my route was to school today. Notice where A is. Notice where B is. Explain to me how one can get lost, plz. By the way, I got to my four o’clock class at 4:30. I didn’t even bother trying to explain it to my professor. Who would believe that a bus driver would get lost? (and who’d have thought a whale would be so heavy?)
-philamaneto!
Filed under Irrationality, Rant
Wierd Shit-o-Meter: Drexel University Volume II
Another idle Monday, another afternoon and evening at school. It was a weird and crappy day. I had lab from 4 to 5:30, and my partner and I didn’t get to go…so there was literally no reason to show up. But that’s alright. Afterwards, I had a little break, sat around for a bit, and headed to the weird class to end all weird classes….mechanical design. Now, as a little background, our professor is a self described “funny little Polish man,” so sometimes things get…well, a little funny.
Way to be 20th Century, Drexel...
This, children, is a projector. When MY PARENTS were in school, they used to use these things to show notes on the wall. Now, in Drexel’s defense, a lot of professors still use transparencies for some reason, so I guess there’s still enough of a demand to keep ‘em around. This one looks brand new, though. I digress…so Professor FLPM has a really thick Polish accent, so a lot of things come out sounding different than intended. In the following paragraphs, the Bolded words will be Professor FLPM, and the Italicized words will be a smart ass student. So, since it’s Mechanical Design, there’s a lot of talk about welding and rivets and sheet metal, or as Prof. FLPM say, SHE-it Medal…Dude, he just said SHIT METAL! Very mature. Did I mention I go to COLLEGE?
Notebook is a Secret Nazi
Yes, that is a secret swastika I discovered in my notes. And yes, my calculator helped me discover it. To be fair, I was very closely following the notes that were written on the dry erase board in the front of the classroom. Yes, you read that correctly, I was actually paying attention…
Drexel Classroom is a Secret Nazi!
Egads! See? It really DOES hurt to take notes and pay attention in class. And its some sort of crazy, Nazi claw machine game crane or something. Scary times at Drexel University today…
No, that's not a little leprechaun hat...
We shall be talk today about RIVETS! Ribbits? Like the noise a frog makes? This dude talks like Borat!
A quote not related to this picture, but funny nontheless….So…are we having like a quiz or exam or something soon? DOs you want exam a-next week? FUCK no!
Now, I have NO idea what the class in that room before us was learning about, but I have a hunch that it was something to do with sandwich self esteem….
Global Warming, My Ass!
Okay, say what you will about the earth’s temperature and humanity’s impact on it. I found it weird that the ice seen in this picture was floating UPSTREAM! Not to mention that it was cold enough for there to be ice…in the RIVER…in Philadelphia….
DETOUR FAIL!
It’s a little hard to make out…but there are DETOUR signs pointing ALL THREE DIRECTIONS. The only way to possibly make this any more confusing would be to have an arrow pointing DOWN. Take note, the arrows in the upper left hand corner BOTH say ORANGE DETOUR and tell you to go two different ways. Thanks, PennDOT. Big help.
Quotation Mark Fail
Found this gem on the bus coming home. Don’t worry, SEPTA, I “won’t drill there,” wink wink, nudge nudge…
It was supposed to be a pic of the guy sleeping under it...
Caption aside, I’m really glad I DIDN’T see anyone sleeping there tonight, its way too cold for that nonsense. Still a really neat thing to have on a bridge in the city though…the eagle, not homeless…I just wish I had gotten a better picture (again, of the eagle…).
So that’s about it for now, stay tuned for a little…NAME THE LOCATION contest I have planned, where the first Non-Super Dude to get the location right will get a SUPERDPS prize. Until next time, Go Fuck Yourself, San Diego!
-phila maneto
P.S. What the hell did Temple to do warrant this?
I call bullshit.
Filed under Events, Hot News, Irrationality, Mistakes
